I over think things when it comes to my children (if you are a follower of my blog you probably agree). And I am addicted to research. The other day my son asked me a random question, I think it was “do people eat stingrays” and I said “I don’t know… I’ll…” before I could finish the sentence he said “…Google it!”.
There are upsides to this and down sides. The up side is that I come across some very interesting and helpful information. Like this article that I read yesterday. I think it has a very valid point and it’s something I would like to try to incorporate into my parenting.
The downside is that it just adds to the many things I am trying to do as a parent that are ‘managed’ or ‘forced’. I know it’s difficult being a parent and like any job it requires that you act in a certain way. But it does get tough trying to control your actions and emotions in your own home all day till the children sleep.
It would be easier to just go with my gut when it comes to parenting but my pregnant, hormonal gut right now would sit them in front of crap TV shows all day (B included). Give them anything they want to eat and indulge them in order to stop them whining. Then my non pregnant non hormonal self will probably militarize the home because I don’t deal well with whining children. Our motto in my mother’s house was “Bala Dala3” which, in Arabic, means stop being melodramatic. I would be that x100.
In all seriousness I manage myself in order to control myself not the children. When J doesn’t want to sleep in the room she should be sleeping in (like she didn’t want to last night) and is screaming so loudly that it literally hurts your ears, it take a lot of self control to speak to her calmly. It takes A LOT of will to explain to her how her actions are hurting her and the people around her and how no matter how much she cries these are the rules and we will not change them. Certainly not for someone acting as she was. All of this in a monotone, calm voice.
What I wanted to do was scream back just as loud and for just as long and take away all her toys and ground her for the next weekend and tell her she will never get a bedtime story ever again for as long as she lives. Yes, seriously. That is what I was suppressing.
So while researching too much does make me nervous and confused sometimes it does give me tools to fall back on when I am in a room with a screaming 5-year-old. Or being pinched on my arm by a 2-year-old… THAT is a whole other post! I’m afraid the terrible 2’s have visited my little B and seem to be here to stay. God help us all.
Do you research your parenting or it is all organic and home-grown?
*quote by Wernher von Braun