I am half way through it. Getting bigger and feeling some movement (sometimes). I always forget from one pregnancy to the other all of the little milestones that happen. So I freak out about not feeling the baby move as much as I think I should feel him. Like I freaked out about the days I didn’t have morning sickness. Like I freaked out about not “feeling pregnant”.
So, according to one of the books, applications or websites I read about pregnancy my baby is the size of an orange. Why they keep choosing to compare the baby to different fruits I will never understand (grape then plum then pair and now orange). My little baby can now smile and frown and hear my lovely voice (which has been mostly yelling at S and J every night for acting like monkeys at bedtime! But that’s another story.)
I am excited and impatient to hold this little baby in my arms. And terrified. I am terrified of the birth. Yes I know, monkeys can do it. (second reference to monkeys so far… hummmm) It’s the uncertainty that scares the hell out of me. If you’ve given birth then you’ll know what I’m talking about. After the pain and the labour and the hours of the same thing over and over when it’s time for the baby to come out it’s that uncertainty. When it’s all, basically, on you to get the baby out. When you start pushing and then they tell you that you HAVE to push NOW. And if you don’t or can’t or are in ridiculous amounts of pain they tell you again if you don’t push now it won’t be a good. The baby is tired, and has had enough and needs to come out. That is the part I hate. At that time so much can go wrong.
I am also anxious about what happens after the baby is born. Between the births of my three children now there are at least 3 years. You can explain a lot to a 3 year old. You can have a 3 year old “help” with the baby. What do you do with a 2 year old? A 2 year old who is right now the center of attention because he’s so damn good at getting it and because he might just be the cutest little boy alive. How do you explain to him that the baby in your tummy is coming out one day? And what do you do about jealousy?
How do I explain a baby to a 2 year old? A baby who is going to share the lime light with him? S was great with J when she was born. Their competition and sibling rivalry showed up when J was old enough to say “I CAN DO IT TOO!”. J was great with B when he was born and did everything she could to help out with him. She is still protective over him and there is been no jealousy between them (so far thank God). Will I be as lucky the 3rd time?
What’s the age difference between your children? Was there a lot of jealousy?
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