My little girl turned 7 yesterday. And for some reason I am insanely emotional about it! Before yesterday night we sat on the carpet in her room before bed time and had a little ‘my baby’s growing up’ talk. I of course got all choked up but no way in hell was I going to show J because she would have looked at me as if I was insane I assure you. S would have totally sympathized and probably shed a tear or two himself.
J has always had the reputation of being a tough girl. But out of all my children she is, by far, the most considerate and caring. She always thinks of everyone else before herself. Having said that she will always make sure she has an equal share. I truly admire her.
It’s funny I always imagined I would have a lot of girls. Probably because a lot of girls is what I know and what I grew up with. But God gave me one girl and I was so unsure of how only one girl on her own would be. I still am unsure. It’s foreign to me. I grew up sharing a room with my sisters till I was 15. We borrowed clothes from each other. Fought like mad. Hated going out with each other. Told secrets to each other. Protected each other. And I always imagined only sisters could do that.
Honestly I also had an alterior motive to wanting girls. I felt like they would be the ones who stayed close to me even after they have gotten married and had children. They would make sure their kids would visit Mama B. They would make time in their days for me. Why I have this idea that girls will and boys won’t is beyond me because my brother spends just as much (if not more) time, one on one, with my mother as we do.
My husband also thinks this logic is flawed because he comes from a family of mostly boys who see their parents on almost a daily basis even if it’s only for 5 minutes. He never understood the concern I have and frankly neither do I after writing this all down. I just relaxed that subconsciously I am expecting less of the boys than I am of my daughter. Why? Is it because they are ‘men’ and ‘men’ can do what they want (I am mortified by this though but there is a high possibility this is where it came from!).
Why shouldn’t my sons spend time with me and take care of me when I am old? Why am I not expecting the same? My husband certainly is! It’s time for a change in my subconscious so 123 here we go I am expecting just as much from S B and K and I am of J. In fact I will expect nothing of her and everything of them! Sha6a7t? Bit much? Ok will expect the same.
Do you expect less of your sons when it comes to family obligations?
Wow! I never thought of it…
I like to think of myself as a mother who wont expect much of her kids, this way i am always positively surprised…
Although now that u mention it, i might have to rethink it…
I totally understand!!!
(Boys (Mostly) aren’t close to their parents or their mother from a certain age till.. well, get married and have kids.. etc). Girls on the other hand are more caring or emotional I’m not really sure but they stick to their parents more and get REALLY attached to them!
I get really emotional when I see a man taking care of his parents, specially his mother more than when I see a girl doing it.. I can’t explain why.. I’m not a good writer lol
Anyway, I except same thing of both genders but, since I’ve been growing with my sisters I noticed that we are SO MUCH closer to our parents than my Uncles family since he’s a father of boys only.. Mafe moqarana been 3ilaqat il Bint b Ahlaha ou ilWalad! In sooo many ways!!!!!! We can name some reasons and some will remain unknown.. But it is what it is Elbanat agrab. 99% lol :)
*There are so many quotes about this and stories about this topic. I don’t recall the quote literally but the meaning is when your son get married you lost a son but when your daughter get married you’d keep the daughter and win her husband… something ketha lol *Whew*
Happy belated birthday to J. God bless her and her siblings ou y7fath’hom lek ou yrzgk brhom.